A Few Questions For Monday Morning

I have a few questions... simple questions but ones that perplex me.

I am proud of the kind of food critics my children have become. Over the years, Jeanine and I have encouraged them to think about the food they are eating. It has it's drawbacks, though. Do other people's children ask for a specific style of sandwich cut? Zachary insists on triangles. Jake likes rectangles. Who can keep this straight at 7:30AM?

Does anyone else get up in the morning and look with joy for the newspaper on the front step? For eight years, I dreaded what would be on the headlines. Now, I find myself eager to see the news. Very strange.

I noticed yesterday that Ben's mustache is coming in. I also noticed mine is, too. As he edges into manhood, I'm edging into menopause. I'm wondering... will we start shaving at the same time?

The Republicans don't like the stimulus plan being presented by the Obama administration. Why is anyone surprised? A bunch of pork crazed maniacs when in power, suddenly the GOP is claiming purity. Please. Like a two year old caught with donut sugar on his face saying someone else ate the last one, do they really think anyone believes them?

You know you've been married a long time, perhaps too long, when you can anticipate being blamed senselessly for years to come. Jeanine insists I moved a cable of hers- you have no idea who many cables there are in this house due to her studio- and I know that for the next thirty years I will be blamed for it's disappearance. Does she think I went out back, dug a hole and buried it? And to what end?

With Gitmo soon to be shut down, does anyone else wonder if war crime indictments might be forthcoming? We as a country are quick to put to trial other leaders- will we have the courage to put our own leaders on the witness stand?

What do you think?

What's her Name Again?

or did they pick someone new?

Quite a Day of Republican Blunder News...

Every time my email buzzes- and it's been buzzing all day pretty much non-stop- it's another piece of news about the Republican party.

First off, I have to ask the question, who the hell did the vetting on Sarah Palin? Oh, wait, there was none. McCain spoke to her for 30 minutes and made up his mind. THAT'S the kind of decision making we need in the White House. Gut feelings. Instinct.

Personally, I think they should have hired the "liberal bloggers" who have come up with quite a bit of dirt. Palin's 17 year old daughter is pregnant- something the Republican "party officials sought to keep... secret."

Um... nice try.
Then there is that speech Palin, made this June "before the Assembly of God, Palin painted the current war in Iraq as a messianic affair in which the United States could act out the will of the Lord." Wait, aren't the religious extremists Al- Qaeda? Aren't they the ones fighting a "holy" war?

Then there is the small problem with her new son in law, Levi Johnston, who seems to be quite a charming, young man. "On his MySpace page, Johnston boasts, "I'm a f - - -in' redneck" who likes to snowboard and ride dirt bikes.

"But I live to play hockey. I like to go camping and hang out with the boys, do some fishing, shoot some s- - - and just f - - -in' chillin' I guess."

"Ya f - - - with me I'll kick [your] ass," he added. "

I can only imagine what he would wear to the Inaugural Ball.

Is that all? Oh, no. Please.

Palin's husband was arrested for DUI in 1986. Hey, we all make mistakes. He was young and foolish, no question. But where was the due diligence on this? What kind of campaign is McCain running?

It also seems Palin "was a member for two years in the 1990s of the Alaska Independence Party, which has at times sought a vote on whether the state should secede." Is that her foreign policy experience? Planning on being in her own country?

My favorite? The leak that Johnny Prozac McCain- who must have been slipping his meds to the family dog- he had a fit over being denied Joe Lieberman or Tom Ridge as his running mate by the powers that be. No one had even been to Alaska to ask any questions. They are there now, and I think that's what we call, a day late and a dollar short.

But then, the Republicans are kinda big on being a dollar short. The current administration has landed us in an estimated 9.5 trillion dollars of debt.

Oh, wait, there are the "anarchists" who were arrested for peacefully protesting the RNC yesterday. I never knew Amy Goodman was an anarchist but I guess asking questions and taking pictures is pretty much against the law in this country now.

I bet there is a lot of prayer going on at the convention right now- for another storm to take the spotlight off what is due to go down as the most ridiculous, ill-advised, blunder-filled, campaign in American history.

Wait... I have another 20 emails... I'm sure there is more...