Confession

Yesterday, I goofed off.

I did not do the laundry. I have taught the boys to bring their laundry to the basement when they need it done. This of course means they wait until every last piece of clothing has been worn- at least twice- before hauling the brimming baskets to the basement. Stunned at my inefficiency, they fought this morning over the last pair of clean socks.

I did not pay any bills. Okay, that is not unusual for me, as I tend to look at the pile and move it to another place in my office until it comes full circle back to my desktop, a day before their due date.

I did not finish my book proposal, although it sits 98 percent done. This is my own way of sabotaging myself. If it’s not done, then I don’t have to send it out and I won’t be rejected. Clever, huh?

I did not get archival ink so I could print out my photos to hang at a friend’s office- a very casual gallery space. Or look into framing them. Again, if the photos aren’t printed and framed, I can’t really go hang them. If I don’t hang them, I don’t have to take myself seriously as a photographer.

I did not exercise. This was probably the only thing that was okay to skip. I do run six days a week. My body needs a break. I am slowly coming around to the reality that I cannot run six days a week anymore.

I did not make a doctor’s appointment for Jake, or dentist appointments for the whole crew, including me. What’s another day? Well… I’ve been saying that for about a month.

I did not deal with flight changes emailed to me telling me the very convenient flight over the April vacation I booked a while ago has been changed. What was once a non-stop, easy traveling alone with three boys (why do all parents say they are traveling ‘alone’ when in fact, they have their children with them?) will now be a late in the afternoon, guaranteed to be delayed, connection filled nightmare.

I… went and had a facial.

Because when you are a suburban housewife? You get to take the day sometimes and do something really self-indulgent.

I am learning how to slow down, how to be more patient, more deliberate in my life. A friend said to me at lunch the other day, you know, I could be really stressed about my day today. I have a lot to do. Or I could see a list of things I am really looking forward to, things I choose to do.

Today I will tackle the laundry and appointments. I will write one more paragraph for my book proposal, making it 99 percent done. I will pick up where I left off Tuesday, not with a panic but with an even pace.

The best perk of being a housewife? It’s okay to goof off for a day.