Sunday, December 27, 2009


I am in Hawaii. It is beyond beautiful. I cannot begin to explain, so I will start taking a lot of photos to show. It is my first time and when Jeanine went for work last year, she said, oh, we have to go.

I know. I live a very blessed life.

Walter, the kids, Jeanine's Mom, are all with us. We rise with the rooster crowing- it's just so funny that there are wild chickens on the island. It's as if this gentle land only has one evil to throw at you... wild chickens.

Um... ok.

We arrived after what felt like the longest day in history- up at 3AM eastern standard time, finally arriving here at 8pm Hawaiian time. Dazed and a little confused, we all stayed up till about 9:30pm, to try and adjust to the time as quickly as possible.

Have I mentioned I don't do well with the lack of sleep?

Yesterday was a day of pool, beach, pool, beach, pool. We ended up in Hanalei, at a little restaurant for dinner- The Dolphin. It was fabulous with fresh fish, sushi, ceviche, and of course, chicken for the Weezie.

By 7pm, though, Jake was falling asleep in his dinner. (This seems to be a pattern for him!) We drove back, and the older boys went down to the pool with Jeanine, Walter and I.

The place was empty, but the ocean waves were great and we were all talking while the boys swam. Suddenly, and I mean suddenly, a wave of nausea went over me. I got sick. I'll never be annoyed with Ben for not making the toilet again, because I didn't. It was the change in time, the sun, the lack of sleep that caught up to me.

I went to the ladies room.

There was an older gentleman attendant cleaning the ladies room. I was in no mood or shape to wait.

He said the all too familiar refrain, "This is the ladies room..."

Now, in better spirits, I would have flashed him the bad girls and let him know I belonged but I was in no mood.

I know where I am, and I belong here and please leave now.

He did, but then poked his head back in, certain I was a man in the ladies room- mind you, there was not another soul at the pool. Did it really matter that much?

I said, LEAVE, thank you. Now.

He did.

This is a beautiful place. My heart is so full with my family here, enjoying the warm, the sand, the ocean. But paradise? Paradise would be a place where no one asks me if I belong in the ladies room.

I guess this isn't quite it.


Blogger Cathy Whitman said...

ok well that explains that! OLD and SENILE!!

Had to be to miss those giant taa-taa's!

Don't let the hater ruin a once in a life time vacation!

2:13 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

As annoying as that person came across, I'm sure "hater" isn't suiting.

Hope the rest of the vacation gets better!

7:04 PM  
Blogger Ms. Moon said...

Yep. I don't think he was a hater. Merely confused. I hope.
Oh dear Woman! Let that slip off your shoulders with the sunset.

10:55 PM  
Anonymous donald said...

sure it wasn't wine, sort of like the flight of 13 we had one night??? LMAO

glad you all made it safely, have a great week!

4:24 AM  
Blogger Ulla said...

Please, why are toilets even separate? I'm sure you would be the first to throw a fit if the cleaner didn't care that a man had just walked into the ladies room to just wait for the next woman to enter, so that he could harrass her.
It happens to me, too, by the way. I look like a man. But I know people do not mean to be rude, they are just concerned. When I smile and say 'Yes, I AM a women' and just proceed, they are generally very (and needlesly, in my view) apologetic.
I think your anger over mistreatment of lesbians and gender queer people are rubbing off on a lot of completely ignorant, innocent people. That's not the way to win hearts and minds.

5:44 AM  
Blogger Sara said...

Oh, if I hadn't been barfing, I think I would have shrugged and gone on.

I always do. this happens to me constantly. This isn't a once or twice a month thing. I get called Sir every day.

Nah, I let it go. Of course I did.

Not a hater, just ignorant, to be sure. but what I find facinating is that even with NO ONE around, the gender rules were very tight and specific. I agree with Ulla, I don't know why there are separate bathrooms. take out the urinals and everyone have stalls and really, what is the big deal? Most people grew up sharing bathrooms with siblings and parents- I don't know a single house with separate bathrooms for men and women.

Mostly? it was once again a reminder to me why transgender issues are so important to me. it follows me everywhere.

12:46 PM  
Anonymous Ulla Lauridsen said...

My university was built late sixties, when marxism was all the rage. No separate bath rooms. The pool for the sports students had one big, shared shower/wardrobe. The latter was changed, though, people couldn't get used to it, apparently.
I once visited a high school with only one shower/dressing areal for after PE.

2:41 PM  

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