Saturday, May 12, 2007

Tell Me Again Why Letting Go is a Good Thing?

The back door was left wide open this morning by the boys. Big excitement, we’re having a party tonight. The fundraiser was a bust- too many people had too many excuses. Asking New Englanders for money is not easy and I’m not good at it. I gave up.

Still, there were the few who were willing to part with their precious dollars and I thought, what the heck. Let’s hang out anyway.

I’ve tried to be very laid back about the party. Not assign dishes for people to bring, no checking ten times to see who was actually going to come, who was not. I let go.

It’s enough to give me a heart attack. I am not one who lets go. Ever.

While the kids were outside screaming at 8am this morning- making my neighbors once again the greatest people on earth- the cat returned from her early morning hunt.

With a baby rabbit in her mouth.

A still very much alive baby rabbit.

In my kitchen- at least for a moment.

I have ribs in the oven, I’m making hamburger patties for this afternoon and I have no idea who is coming. I have no idea how many people will bring other food and if I need two bottles of wine or ten… and I have a cat playing with a wild rabbit in my kitchen.

The cat then took the rabbit upstairs to my bedroom. Why? Perhaps because I shrieked at her.

The baby rabbit ran around my bedroom. I followed it. The cat followed it. It ran into the closet. The closet that Allan once had sparkling clean and neat which is now… uh… not sparkling clean and neat.

So many places for a baby rabbit to hide.

I caught the rabbit before the cat did and scooped it into a box. The cat was not happy. She meowed at me as if to say, HEY LADY THAT’S MY BREAKFAST!

The rabbit appeared to be blood free so I let it outside and left the cat inside.

You told everyone to bring food to the party, Zachary laughed. Sofia was just doing her part.

Very funny.

In a few hours I’ll have ten or thirty people here. I’m trying to stay calm. I made a mental note this morning to never have this kind of party again. I need structure. I like structure. There are places in my life I need to stretch and grow but this is not one of them. I like to set a beautiful table, I like to make sure everything is prepared, the kitchen clean before anyone walks in the door.

I like to have control.

Because there are some things in life, you can never control.

Like a cat. And a baby rabbit.


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