Monday, March 12, 2007

Tampon Free Household

A friend forwarded me a tampon gift site last night.

Click on the little heart and drag it in the house. It’s a real site for donating products to shelters in your state. (The Consumer Relations Department at Seventh Generation confirmed the program.)

This is clearly because there is a surplus now I haven’t had my period in 9 weeks. Seventh Generation said, well, damn, that Whitman woman is done so whadda do with all these extra tampons?

Jeanine apologized for getting her period the other day. And then tittered something under her breath about being so much younger. Of course, she will probably breeze through menopause. Her mother, who not only has flawless skin, she also barely remembers menopause.

Titter away, big girl. You’re the one who has to live with me through this.

And thus the unique joy of two women living together. So many straight women have said to me, damn, if I could have made my husband give birth to one of the children, I would have in a heartbeat.

Realize, ladies, that there will be two of us going insane. Not going to be pretty. And it doesn’t mean any more compassion and understanding. Just two really angry, volatile women under one roof.

Pity the boys.


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