Monday, December 22, 2008

Almost All Set

I'm never really actually ready for Christmas. I always forget something- the coconut for the ambrosia salad, or a stocking stuffer I thought would be fun. I am always going to the grocery store, last minute, on Christmas eve for something.

I do love to stop by the mall to watch the men shop. It's amazing to me how men wait till the very last moment in time, and then are casual, as if there was nothing at stake.

Yes, it is a gender difference. I have never ever known a woman to do such a thing. And when I'm walking around on Christmas eve? It's all men. And me. Watching.

I've been at this since Thanksgiving, when I made sure all out of town folks were taken care of. I could start in July and I'd still be here, two days before, realizing there is much to be done.

Tonight I finished about 50 Christmas cards. Okay, I started them, too. But they will hit the mail before the day, and that's enough for me.

What is it with email cards? Hello? It's cheating. I don't care if it's environmentally sound... it's lazy.

Oh my. I sound like my mother. Who, I have to say, I hold in my head when it comes to buying gifts- she was the best at it. I also hold her in my heart- the part that gave me the best cinnamon rolls recipe ever, the love of ambrosia salad, and gold rimmed glasses for Christmas breakfast.

She gave me a lot of things I don't like about Christmas but I've let them go. I don't want to hold the bad memories anymore. It's too exhausting.

I find that my heart is at peace, for once. I've helped Jeanine with the dreaded cookie making that cost us about 15 couple therapy sessions- at least- because I simply could not make nice with the whole idea.

I made nice. I realized it costs me more emotionally to be angry than to smile. I don't need to be right. I only want to be happy.

The kids will race down tomorrow morning and stare at the tree. Then they will all sing, and dance and generally make loud, happy noises about how close it is to Christmas.

I don't remember ever feeling the urge to sing in my home as a child. It's very foreign to me. Sheer happiness.

It does require a cup of coffee, though. 7AM is still 7AM.

By tomorrow night, the cookies will have been delivered- locally, at least. Cards sent. Groceries bought. Presents for the cats and dog.

Everything is almost all set.

Let the songs begin.

6 Comments:

Blogger Ashes To Life said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

1:33 AM  
Blogger aj said...

Merry Christmas Sara.

1:34 AM  
Blogger Sue J said...

I'm so glad you kept those cats. It sounds like they landed in a wonderful home.

9:09 AM  
Blogger Sara said...

ah, they still get startled by all the boys running around, but for the most part, their life is pretty sweet.

I love my cats. something about their entirely conditional love- feels good when you get it.

11:08 AM  
Blogger Suzy said...

sorry you feel that way about ecards. Just think of it as sharing pictures in a chrismasy way.
Merry and Happy.
ttfn

9:13 PM  
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