Thursday, October 23, 2008

Save The Children

I’ve had enough.

I’m tired of being treated like some freak that needs to be carefully sidestepped at every election as if supporting my marriage is touching the third rail. I’m tired of the rhetoric that “gay marriage” will be taught in classrooms across the land and small children will be exposed to sexuality in inappropriate ways if equality is given to all.

The children, oh, please, save the children.

The newest ploy in California to take away equal rights is to use Massachusetts, my home state, as an example of all that will go wrong. Children will be “forced” to learn about gay families.

They may even be exposed to a book, “King and King,” that on one page? Shows two men kissing.

Oh, the horror. I have to admit, any time my kids’ see my wife and I give each other a peck, they do shriek in disgust. The same way all kids do when they see their parents express affection.

What makes me the angriest is not the stones they are throwing at me- bring it on- but the effect it has on my kids. My kids aren’t gay. They have gay parents. Should their teacher have to send out a permission form every time one of my kids mentions his parents? If they draw a picture of their family, does it require parental notification?

Is that what we want in our schools? A lock down on anything different?

The people so concerned with the “children” are clearly not concerned with mine at all. While it’s fine for my son’s fifth grade teacher to come in and share pictures and stories about her heterosexual marriage ceremony, it’s suddenly all about sexual behavior when a lesbian or gay man does it.

I will admit, all my kids did, in fact, talk about our wedding at school. It was historic, it was about social change and you know what they discussed? The chocolate fountain at the reception. The giant bouquets of hostess Twinkies, ho ho’s and cupcakes.

They are kids. They have lives they want to share with their friends. Why should they be singled out for different treatment because of who their parents are? Can you even imagine anyone recommending doing this to kids of interracial marriages?

Proposition 8 supporters are running ads with little children asking their heterosexual parents about men with men, and women with women. Funny thing is, with all those heterosexual teachers at school, some parading around with pregnant bellies, and I have never once had my kids ask about heterosexual sex practices.

Nor do they come home and ask, Mommy? Can a man and woman get married? And it’s not solely because kids are awash in 24/7 media images of men and women together, often sexually, but because they don’t really care.

They care about their worlds. Soccer games. Playdates. Chocolate fountains.

And so what if kids do come home and ask about gay families? If you’re really such a bigot, just spew out all the hateful things you have to say about homosexuality. See it as a teachable moment.

Son, if you grow up to be gay, we’ll disown you, the church will shun you and in fact, you’ll burn in hell. Now go do your homework.

I’m tired of being treated like some leper that will infect children with horrible values simply by being acknowledged. I’ve got news for those folks- I’m a parent, first and foremost. I’m also a wife, a writer, a neighbor, a friend, a colleague, and a pretty damn good cook. I coach my son’s soccer team, I fold laundry and I make my kids brush their teeth. I volunteer at the school on occasion even though on top of it all, I’m a big ol’ lesbian.

The kids don’t care. They just want someone to help tie their shoes, or pick out a library book.

Save the children? Don’t believe it for a second. They only want to save a hateful way of seeing the world through very narrow eyes.

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Anonymous Anonymous said...

you're probably gonna wanna watch this...

5:31 PM  
Anonymous .heather. said...


7:21 PM  
Blogger Sue J said...

What heather said ...

7:59 PM  
Anonymous below 14th said...

what sue j said.

8:11 PM  
Anonymous Laura said...

right.....because we ALL know that children of heterosexual parents are never abused, mistreated, or neglected. The are well adjusted and just perfect!


8:36 PM  
Blogger Seda said...

Very. Well. Said.

It's surreal that they're using MA as a tool in support of Prop. (H)8. Like, let's see, MA allowed gays to marry and, um, lezzee, the sky's still up there, the straights are still getting married and divorced, and the wedding cake bakers improved their profit margin. Whoopdedoo.


9:36 PM  
Blogger Suzy said...

I couldnt believe it when I read it either. As far as I know they don't teach any set lessons on marriage in any school I know of. I like what Ellen said on her last show about it she said "gee they are afraid we will infect the kids I was raised in a hetero family and was surrounded by hetero people in school and it didn't change me sure I dabbled in high school don't we all but I came out ok." I wish more people could flip it to show how silly what they are saying is. Yes sara you are an amazing cook, mother, wife, and friend and you are more "normal" than most the people I know. Lets just hope more people see it for what it is, crap, and vote to make it equal for everybody. Ok I will put pollyanna back in the closet but I have to believe or Ian and I are moving to Ireland lol.

10:05 PM  
Anonymous Eddie89 said...

Sara! You GO GIRL! You wrote it EXACTLY like it really is! And that's also exactly how I feel about this whole, disgusting, demoralizing mess!

People of priviledge just don't understand. How it feels to be told most of your life that we can't be married because we're the same gender. And then finally a State Supreme Court gets the case, evaluates it against the State Constitution and finds no legal basis to deny a "civil" marriage to a same-gender couple!

So, we get the opportunity to marry the person we love and then have a group of holy high rollers with deep pockets attempt to hijack our State Constitution!

"Let the people vote" my caboose!

If we had done that in the past with similar "minority" rights issue, then women would not be able to vote today, blacks would still have separate dining areas in many towns and cities and interracial couples would have to leave the country to be able to marry!

This is tyranny of the majority in it's purest form!

California - Vote "NO" on Prop. 8!
Arizona - Vote "NO" on Prop. 102! AGAIN!
Florida - Vote "NO" on Amendment 2!
Connecticut - Vote "NO" on Question 1!

1:59 AM  
Blogger Rev. Bob said...

When we were demonstrating in the early 1960s, we didn't say "We want a little bit of freedom now and a little more later, if it isn't too muh trouble, please."

We said, "We want freedom now." We were right and we won.

I'm not discouraged, I'm not worried, I'm mad!

Let's win this sucker.

7:00 AM  
Anonymous charlotte gordon said...

i wanted you to know that this MA feminist is completely with you. I want your kids to bring in their pictures of your wedding and show them to their teachers and classmates.
When they grow up, they are going to be proud of their moms.

9:54 AM  
Anonymous TCS said...

Thanks for this. I too am angry at feeling like the "third rail". I don't set out to offend anyone, but my existence and my family's existence are not negotiable.

On the brighter side, our semi-religious Jewish daycare put our son's family picture up with those of all the other families. Nobody -- neither the Jewish parents nor the Catholic teachers nor anyone else -- has complained to me that their toddler is being corrupted.

Some older kids of glbt parents speak out, quite charmingly:

-Theresa (mama of a 13-month-old boy)

10:19 AM  
Blogger said...

couldn't have said it better myself.

:::going back to my wife, 2 teenage kids, 2 dogs and 3 birds:::

Oh yeah .. and my FULL tax rate for LESS rights. yeah, that too.

11:31 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Please see the link >

11:03 AM  
Anonymous Paper Dolls for Boys said...

I am raising you up onto my shoulders now (I think you said it was okay) and doing a victory lap because THAT was an EXCELLENT post. Truth!

9:17 AM  
Blogger Jennifer said...

As a gay mom in Central California's "Bible Belt"'ll never know how much we all appreciate that you all are as sick of this crap as we are.

1:41 AM  
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8:54 PM  

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