Radical Change in Ordinary Moments
All I can say is that is one helluva lot of work for a single day of celebration.
It's quiet in the house now. The boys went with Walter and Allan to sleep over last night. This morning? Haircuts. We are off to Florida to celebrate Jeanine's Mom's 70th birthday and there will be a family photo taken. I'm not going to have them look like orphaned children pulled off the streets.
The cats are snorting their catnip toys. I fear for the tree but it's going to be taken down today, along with all the dishes piled up being cleaned, the decorations all put away.
I think that's my favorite part of Christmas- getting back to normal again.
Jeanine is still sleeping and there is much laundry to be done before I can pack for the trip.
Last night, we all played the game the boys gave Jeanine for Christmas- Rock Band 2. Allan scored a perfect 100% singing "Spirit in the Sky." We had a fabulous dinner of homemade wontons, finishing just in time to see the Celtics choke and lose.
As much as I love being a grinch and complain, I have to say, Christmas was very nice this year. Jeanine and I talked about how we only have a few more years with the kids being so excited they have to be up at 6AM. We'll have to give the cats their little 'nip stash the night before so they tear across us in the morning.
This holiday has been filled with old and new friends. I've mended a relationship with a friend that was very important to me. We went bowling with our Moms group that has become my extended family the weekend before Christmas which was playful and fun. As we all lounged on couches eating pizza after, I tried my best to soak in all the love.
It's a little overwhelming sometimes.
Ben was thrilled with his gift from his most inappropriate Aunt- Flava of Love, seasons one through too many.
Zachary ended up outfitted for... something.
And Jake... Jake is still little, in so many ways. He pretended to believe in Santa, although quietly he did tell me he knew better. I told him the magic of Santa never goes away.
There were a few tears- the new Star Wars lego set was hard to assemble even with Mom Jeanine's help- but nothing dramatic. I took my dog on a long walk in the woods and it was a glorious, sunny day.
As I get ready for the clean up, I can't help but wonder what it will take in this society to recognize my family. Do we have to be victims of brutal crimes to be sympathetic? Do we have to be dying or sick in hospitals before someone believes asking for our rights is a reasonable thing?
Why can't it be simply because it's the right thing to do? In so many ways, as I sit here this morning, I'm like every other suburban housewife. I don't understand.
Maybe it's because no one takes the time to see the ordinary. It doesn't make you cringe, nor laugh out loud. I hope to create radical change in those moments. I do not want to be a victim to be heard.
For now? I'll go fill the dishwasher. Start taking the lights down off the tree. Wake my wife up and get her to unclog the sink in the bathroom downstairs.
Christmas is over. I love my family.
And just like every other suburban housewife, I will do my best for them in this coming year.
It's quiet in the house now. The boys went with Walter and Allan to sleep over last night. This morning? Haircuts. We are off to Florida to celebrate Jeanine's Mom's 70th birthday and there will be a family photo taken. I'm not going to have them look like orphaned children pulled off the streets.
The cats are snorting their catnip toys. I fear for the tree but it's going to be taken down today, along with all the dishes piled up being cleaned, the decorations all put away.
I think that's my favorite part of Christmas- getting back to normal again.
Jeanine is still sleeping and there is much laundry to be done before I can pack for the trip.
Last night, we all played the game the boys gave Jeanine for Christmas- Rock Band 2. Allan scored a perfect 100% singing "Spirit in the Sky." We had a fabulous dinner of homemade wontons, finishing just in time to see the Celtics choke and lose.
As much as I love being a grinch and complain, I have to say, Christmas was very nice this year. Jeanine and I talked about how we only have a few more years with the kids being so excited they have to be up at 6AM. We'll have to give the cats their little 'nip stash the night before so they tear across us in the morning.
This holiday has been filled with old and new friends. I've mended a relationship with a friend that was very important to me. We went bowling with our Moms group that has become my extended family the weekend before Christmas which was playful and fun. As we all lounged on couches eating pizza after, I tried my best to soak in all the love.
It's a little overwhelming sometimes.
Ben was thrilled with his gift from his most inappropriate Aunt- Flava of Love, seasons one through too many.
Zachary ended up outfitted for... something.
And Jake... Jake is still little, in so many ways. He pretended to believe in Santa, although quietly he did tell me he knew better. I told him the magic of Santa never goes away.
There were a few tears- the new Star Wars lego set was hard to assemble even with Mom Jeanine's help- but nothing dramatic. I took my dog on a long walk in the woods and it was a glorious, sunny day.
As I get ready for the clean up, I can't help but wonder what it will take in this society to recognize my family. Do we have to be victims of brutal crimes to be sympathetic? Do we have to be dying or sick in hospitals before someone believes asking for our rights is a reasonable thing?
Why can't it be simply because it's the right thing to do? In so many ways, as I sit here this morning, I'm like every other suburban housewife. I don't understand.
Maybe it's because no one takes the time to see the ordinary. It doesn't make you cringe, nor laugh out loud. I hope to create radical change in those moments. I do not want to be a victim to be heard.
For now? I'll go fill the dishwasher. Start taking the lights down off the tree. Wake my wife up and get her to unclog the sink in the bathroom downstairs.
Christmas is over. I love my family.
And just like every other suburban housewife, I will do my best for them in this coming year.
Labels: gay and lesbian families, lesbian mom, LGBT families, lgbt rights
posted by Sara at 9:28 AM
3 Comments:
Maybe, Sara, what you're doing is the only way to do it- just being the most normal of normal families is the most radical act available. Society's blessing is missing. So what? What is society?
No, of course you don't have the laws of the (misguided to say the least) land on your side and that makes the issues impossible to ignore, but going about your life with your family in the way that you do and writing about it is putting cracks in the walls of ignorance and fear in ways that nothing else could.
No marching, no petition, no screaming or yelling for rights is going to do as much as simply TAKING your right as a human being to be with the people you love and creating a family with them.
Clogged sinks, growing boys, wonton dinners, haircuts and all.
I salute your ordinary moments which are creating (even if you can't always see that) radical change.
It really is amazing that Americans get all worked up over the idea of a "gay family" while at that same time, my television spews shows full of "straight families" that have 18 children; quintuplets (or whatever - I just know it's way too many toddlers running around 2 incredibly dim-witted parents); housewifes of ... wherever, who are rich and arrogant and mean and ridiculous; various addicts and alcoholics; etc., etc., etc.
But the family with three young boys excited about Christmas morning and then going to see Grandma in Florida is radical?
It sounds like you all had a great time. In the end, your children will be the well-adjusted adults in charge some day, not those I mentioned above. That gives me some hope.
(But the Flava of Love thing is kind of scary ....)
Ben looks really non-horrible, blissed out on Christmas. Zack and Jake look funny and cute, respectively and look like they have the being a kid business aced. You done good.
You and your family are here with us in America. If people in a smaller, worse place like Bushland and Warrenville try to hassle us, we make like ducks and let it roll off. Or we stand up and resist. They're already mostly dead. If they die as ugly as they've lived, it's mostly their problem. We've survived worse than them. They're just nasty little squirts. If a few of them wise up and join us or reject the whole them and us thing, even better.
P.s., Wonkette readers have a new term for America's favorite hockey mom: igloo trash. Moose clown sounds good too.
Hi Sue and Ms. Moon. It's really good to see you again. Hope your Christmases were as merry as Sara's and ours.
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