Friday, January 30, 2009

Moving Forward

Denver... you have to love a city where they don't run you down when you're in the crosswalk. And everyone is actually in the crosswalk.

Strange for a Bostonian to see.

The community continues to digest the Prop 8 loss. Sure, people are talking about AZ and FL but the focus is on California. What went wrong? How could we have lost? Will we ever win a ballot question or are we destined to lose them forever?

The most productive statement came from Nadine Smith, of Equality Florida. We must, she said, be out on every form, every moment, of every waking day. If we travel, we fill out forms as married people. If we file taxes? We file as married people. When ever, where ever we can, we must identify ourselves.

It's Harvey Milk's message. It continues to be relevant.

It is an act of non-violent civil disobedience. We must refuse to be considered single when we are families.

There is still a level of finger pointing going on that makes me very uncomfortable. I don't see the point. Positive messages, like Ms. Smith's, is where we need to focus our energy.

Let's move forward, folks.

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Blogger Seda said...

You're exactly right, Sara. This is the message, the way forward. Forget blame. No one is to blame and everyone is, and it doesn't matter anyway.

It's a message that hits home, as a transwoman. When I'm out, everyone can see (well, actually, I'm finally starting to pass...). Sometimes that's scary. Sometimes you get nasty looks or comments. Sometimes it's not even safe. But people in the middle - fence-sitters, people who haven't thought much about it - see the nastiness, and when you respond with humor and patience, guess who wins? Another mind is changed.

Milk is right. Invisibility is death.

Thanks for this post. It's one our whole community needs to hear. And thanks, also, for your support for my peculiar issues.

12:17 PM  
Anonymous donald said...

great post, and totally correct! i have been totally out since i was a teenager. you know how conservative it can be here in downeast maine. i have never had a major problem and know that i have changed lots of minds about gay people. to all of you, if your state has a speakout program, get involved. it makes a real difference.

12:32 PM  
Anonymous Existential Punk said...

Great post and very right on! i think, though, some process/grieve at different speeds and we must give them that space. Yet, blaming get's us nowhere really.

i love Harvey Milk's message of being out everywhere we go telling people we are everywhere, we are real humans who contribute to society, and we have families too.


Warm Regards,


1:33 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I like it. Yes. Non-Violent civil disobedience. This is the way.

11:40 PM  
Blogger Rev. Bob said...

Seda! I tried to give you a shout out at Field's but it got eated.

It's also time for us allies to come out and go nose to nose with people who are denying our friends the validity of their existence.

But pedestrians staying inside crosswalks, that's crazy talk.

5:20 AM  
Blogger Sue J said...

You're exactly right, of course. I can't even count the number of times I've had a discussion about things like taxes, benefits, etc. with a straight friend who suddenly "sees the light" when they realize all this "gay rights" stuff affects the daily life of me and my partner -- their dear friends.

How man times have I heard "Oh. I never thought about that. That really sucks."

9:51 AM  
Blogger John Bisceglia said...

Uh...NAIL, you just got hit on the HEAD! Thank God more people are less-scared of civil disobedience, Sara.

Non-Violent Civil Disobedience.

Equality is OURS TO TAKE.

Unless you enjoy begging for what you are ALREADY entitled to as an American....

11:33 PM  

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